As we head into another Father’s Day it’s a good time to examine our own parenting techniques. As parents we have a responsibility to do the best we can, and instilling self-confidence in young children is a major part of that. For some tips we spoke with Taylor Draper, CEO and co-founder of Inherent Clothier, an online custom menswear shop that is both a personal stylist and a mental health awareness movement.

Opening up about feelings through fashion, Draper is allowing everyone to walk in his shoes, and suit… literally. Taylor’s podcast series Dressing for Wellness expands on personal and guest’s everyday struggles.

With Father’s day around the corner, Draper understands some of the greatest gifts to give are lessons, understanding his own struggles, the gift of confidence is what he’d like to teach his own children.

With small children, here’s how Draper and his wife are approaching mental health – including confidence.

Tips for teaching children self-confidence:

1. Letting them do things themselves, instead of jumping in to intervene constantly, or helicopter parenting. When you don’t let them work through what they’re trying to accomplish themselves it can send the message that you don’t believe that they can do things themselves.

2. Teach them how to ask for help. So if children want help they’ll ask for it and of course, as parents, we will help out. Because of this approach, we’ve seen more confidence in what the children will do, and they listen more.

3. Try to say yes, and positively reinforce if we have to say no. Really explain to small children why things are not ok, instill it with kindness. This way they can still make their own decision on what to do next or play with next, and when they divert attention, THANK them for listening.

4. Kids can pick up on emotions, and understand a lot more than we give them credit for. So really be that role model in every sense.

5. Over explain to young children. Even if they understand 5% of everything we’re explaining, that’s still 5% more than if we were to assume they didn’t need further explanation.

6. Parents are in a leadership position, and one of the best ways to lead is by example. If you’re constantly tearing yourself down, they will be able to pick up on that and assume that’s the right thing to do. So make sure you’re also giving yourself the opportunity to feel good about yourself, no matter what that looks like.
Dressing well, taking care of your skin, working out, going on a walk, meditating, any form of self-care should be a priority. If a plane’s going down you need to secure your own oxygen before you can help others. This principle is the same for self-care. If you’re not feeling good about yourself, how can you help your child feel good about themselves? I know we’re all human and we’re not perfect. Not every day is going to be a win, and we’re going to make mistakes.

6. It’s always OK to not be OK – and that’s another lesson we try to teach kids. We explain to them when we’re having hard days, and what we do to try and feel better about it. Kids have adult-sized emotions in tiny little bodies, so it can be extreme. Let them feel their emotions, they’re there for a reason!